Donald Trump Is a Woosy

I was pleased to announce in this space my candidacy for the Republican nomination for President a few short months ago.  And it wasn't a moment too late! Now it is my obligation as a True American to ride to the rescue as that faker and weakling, Donald Trump, has announced his tepid, belated plans to deny entry of Muslims to America.  The Donald is a Woosy.  His plan does not go near far enough.  Let me tell you my plan to save America from Not-America.

Let me point out that The Donald cannot bring himself to call the Catholics exactly what they are: pope-hatted naked child butt-lovers.  That's right!  It is time not only to deny them any further "entry", but they should be expelled from America immediately, right along with the Mexicans, who, not coincidentally are largely catholic.  Anyone who disagrees with me is just begging to get their kid buggered.  Clearly the Catholics believe no child's behind should be left.  It's in their catechism. Out with them!  Now! No more!

And what about those Jesus murdering Jews?  Millions of nasty, yellow-teethed Jews are here today sucking the bloody tips off of infant's penises.  INFANT PENISES!  They are as disgusting as Muslims, and we Real Patriots know it. We need internment camps for the lot of him, Muslims, Jews, Catholics, all of 'em.  Oh, we have one:  it's called Gitmo. Let's fill it up these vermin who don't vote Republican anyway.

Sure, The Donald is well-intentioned with the Muslim thing  But the road to hell is paved with good intentions, isn't it?  Grab your white robes and hood and join MY presidential campaign.  It's the REAL DEAL.  None of that Lamo-Crappo Trump stuff.  Together with me and my WAY RIGHT IDEAS we are already making America GRATE AGAIN!!