The Truth Is a Tortoise, The Lie Is a Hare

This weekend, Congress missed another deadline to pass a budget resolution. That is good thing we are told. Budgets are bad.

In a race between the Lie and the Truth, the Lie always gets a big head start. At the starting line, before the pistol was even fired, the Truth was never in question to begin with. For example, it seemed like it was only yesterday when it was a given that, as a democracy, it was if not a necessity, at least desirable, to govern ourselves. Then the Red, White, and Whiter People, who are self-described as far more patriotic and knowledgeable about our founding principles than us normal people, stood up and said, with the aid of a big “micro” phone, “No we don’t! Whatever made you think such nonsense?” 

The Lie is the Hare in the race. The Hare bragged how much faster he could shut the Gubberment down than us Tortoises could ever catch up to. “We have plenty of time to beat those Tortoise citizens,” he said as he sat down to take a crap on federal workers (and the suppliers and vendors, the restaurant owners that make their lunch, the transit workers that get them back and forth to work, the landlords that collect their rent money on their homes and apartments, the insurance companies that collect their premiums, ad nauseum.) You see, you don’t have to know how the economy works to know better than everyone else who does. You just have to be faster than the Tortoise Truth.

Now, with the Tortoise far behind, the Hare still had plenty of time to lie down and insult some Park Rangers, preferably black and, therefore, presumably lazy ones. Hares are story tellers and lies go together, like chapters in the White Nationalist’s book. And what’s with Black people saying the Confederate Flag symbolizes slavery and a racist past?  The meaning of the Confederate Flag is for White People to say!  So sit down and shut up mind your place Black folks.  If you don’t get it, that just proves that African Americans are the real racists here.

The Gubberment Tortoise plodded on, however slowly, what with the furloughs and all.  The Hare had a tea party, and then took a nap.

He had the sweetest, but perhaps most non sequitur, dream about Green Eggs and Ham.

The afternoon came, and the Hare woke up to a sun low in the west. “Well, better get on with it!” he said. He dashed to the finish line, where he was met by the Tortoise and the Bankers, who were patiently waiting his arrival.

“I am afraid we’re going to have to downgrade your credit,” said the bankers.  “It looks like you can’t meet your obligations.”

The Hare met his friends afterward at the Bunny Club. “What’s wrong with these people?” he cried in his drink. “Why does the whole world read the wrong economists, except us?”