Is ISIS in Crisis?

The word is out that morale inside ISIS is flagging. Could it be that beheading people is positively depressing after all? With the ban on smoking, perhaps there's an entire faction afflicted by nicotine fits. I think I could use a scotch after an auto-de-fe (I don't know the Arabic word for this.) Here's a little advice for how they might lift the spirits of their bedraggled workforce.

• Have a giant game of Twister in the Arabian desert.
• Sing campfire songs about rape and pillage.
• Busting up antiquities with sledge hammers sounds like great fun, how come no workie?
• Have a camel race across Anbar province, carrying female hostages on your shoulders.
• Punkin'-chunkin' at the Kurds. I don't know if they anything pumpkin-like rolling around... Oh no! I'm not going there.

Perhaps they need to hire a cruise director. Some of those folks at Carnival are really good.

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